For days

Give a man a fish and you will feed him for a day, but give a girl a box of saltines and a jar of peanut butter and she will eat (over the sink. Why waste a plate?) for days.

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Judgment

The other day, when I looked at my cat from across the room, she shot me a look so hateful I’m convinced she was judging me. Cats are so uppity sometimes, ammiright?! With their prissy walks the way they stand and stare blankly when you call them.

judgy cat

 

I have no way of knowing exactly what terrible thoughts her cat mind thinks about me everyday, but I can guess.

So here, in no special order, are some reasons my cat might be judging me on any given day:

  • “Dinner” was saltine crackers with peanut butter. And I ate it over the sink.
  • I haven’t done my dishes in so long there’s mold growing on one of my cereal bowls
  • I liked Twilight so much that I’m re-reading it
  • I’m dancing around my apartment to Ke$ha
  • I kinda like Ke$ha’s new song
  • That second (ok, third) cookie
  • I didn’t finish “The Great Gatsby” before I watched the movie
  • I slept in instead of going running (again)